There’s a monster in my school bag.
And he likes to eat my homework.

When I slide my books into my bag
They are all smooth and clean,
But when I take them out again
They’re chewed right out of shape.

Nobody believes me when I say:
It’s the monster in my school bag!
And he likes to eat my homework.
His favourite meal is maths on toast
Washed down with spelling sauce,
For dessert he loves verbs and nouns
In a treacly fraction pie.
Some days he even likes to munch
Through my PE shorts and shirt
Or take a bite from my set square
and lick the lines straight off my ruler.
If I’m not keeping a close eye
He’ll tear up all my school letters
And screw them into tiny balls
So when I come to hand them in
They’re just a pile of crumbs!

There’s a monster in my school bag,
Honestly there is!
At night I hear his tummy
Growling while he sleeps,
In the morning he’s really hungry,
At least I think he is,
‘Cos by the time I get to school
He’s eaten my packed lunch.

Nobody believes me when I say this,
But it’s true. Honest.